Emma, on a certain boy in her class who is mean to everyone, “But he is nice to me.” Why? “Because he likes me.”

Ana, on a classmate, “He gave me his ticket to Skate World when I lost mine on the bus.” Me to Ana, “Why did he give you HIS ticket?” Ana to me, with a duh expression on her face, “Because I lost mine.” Well, he would have been stupid NOT to have given his own up for her, right? Duuuuuh, Mommy.

Emma to me, regarding a boy in her class, “I need to write him a happy note.” Me to Emma, “What makes it a happy note?” Emma to me, “Because he will be happy to get a note from ME.” Likely so.

Emma told me she’s in love with a classmate named “San Diego.” I’m fairly certain that his name is Santiago, but since he calls her “Emily,” it’s all good. Love knows no language barriers in kindergarten!

Emma to me, “When an arrow stabs your heart, that’s when you’re in love.” Sometimes it probably feels like that, huh?

Emma to me, “I think I might get a Valentine this week from (name of boy in her class — yes, the same one from above).” Me to Em, “You think so?” Em to me, “Yeah, it might say ‘I like you.’ Or maybe ‘Ooh, la, la!'” Oh, my.

Wes to Emma, “Are you my valentine?” Emma to Wes, “No.” Wes to Emma, “Well, if you’re not my valentine, I guess I don’t have to buy you a box of chocolates.” Em to Wes, “Oh, Papi, I AM your valentine!” Smart girl.

Em to Wes, regarding a classmate, “Ethan is CUTE!” Wes to Em, “Boys are gross.” Em to Wes, “Not Ethan. He is CUTE, CUTE, CUTE!” Wes to Em, “Ughhh…” Em to Ana, “Hey, you saw Ethan! He is cute, right?” Ana to Wes, “I did, and, Papi, he IS cute.” Wes to them both, “Ughhhh….” Welcome to a preview of life with preteen girls, Papi!

Emma, putting on a plastic ring and pretending that it was a wedding ring from Papi, “Mine is bigger than yours.” Well, you met him when he was a senior pastor, and I met him when he was a janitor. That makes a difference, ya little diva.