This Strange Place

She’s about to do something really dumb.

I know it because I’m the queen of dumb moves.  And likely, I’ve done any number of dumb things that are ten times dumber than what she’s about to do.

But still.  I know how this part of her story will end.  I can clearly see the cliff she’s about to fall right off into, and I know, because I’ve seen it before, that it’s a long, difficult climb back.

She’s my sister in Christ, someone I feel I really know…

… but she’s a Facebook friend. 

A while back, we were real friends.  Actual, see one another face to face, relate to one another, be around one another, REAL friends. 

But the ministry moves you around, and it’s been years since I’ve sat down with her.  And now we find ourselves in this strange place of connecting online, keeping in touch in this vast expanse of the internet, and seeing only of one another what we filter and censor.

If we were who we once were, I wouldn’t hesitate to say, “Girl, you’re about to screw things up.”  And she would probably tell me, “You, too, girl,” regarding any number of areas of my own life.

We would appreciate the accountability likely.  And it would hopefully save us some grief.

But… I hesitate now to write her a message when I don’t know the whole story.  I hesitate to say anything when I can’t honestly say that she’s who she was back when we knew one another on a face-to-face basis.  I hesitate to do anything when her obvious response will and probably should be, “You don’t even know me anymore.”

And she’s right.

I’m in this strange place, wondering what to do, the entire situation raising more questions than answers in my mind.  How do we define our friendships now that we can maintain such superficial connections from any place in the world?  How do we continue to be good friends to people who change and redefine themselves without us ever knowing?  How do we function as the body of Christ, encouraging and challenging one another, when we’re not sitting face-to-face, reduced only to Facebook?

If you have answers… I’d love to hear them.

One thought on “This Strange Place

  1. Shannon says:

    I've been checking back to see what people's answers are…I'd love to hear them, too.
    For what it's worth, *I* would probably still write that private message, doing my best to be loving and clear…but also bracing for defensive anger/resentment, or maybe being ignored entirely.


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