Faulkette Funnies

Faulkette funnies for your Friday…

Ana to me, “I learned what antonyms and synonyms are in school today.” Emma to me, “I learned that chocolate is messy when it melts.” Fancy book learnin’ is good, but it can never trump crucial information about chocolate.

Emma to me, “I’m scared of a lot of things.  Flies, bees, the dark, automatic flush toilets…”  That last one IS terrifying.

Ana to me, “He was so strong he could lift our house in one hand!  He could even lift Papi!”  Lifting a house is one thing, but lifting Papi?  Well…

Emma to me, “I drew you a map of Pasadena.  Here is Wal Mart, McDonald’s, Leslie’s Pool Supplies, and the jail.”  Just the high points.  (And we don’t even have a pool.  Nor do we know anyone in jail.)

Me to Ana, as she freaked out about a particularly nasty looking crow in the grocery store parking lot, “God made him, so he has to be beautiful in some way.”  Ana to me, “His heart is beautiful, I’m sure… but his body sure is ugly.”  There you go.   

Emma’s revisionist history… “Columbus bunked into the wrong island, and the people there said, ‘Hey! Look at his hat! And his shoes! Niiiiice.’ And they liked it.” A pause. “But Columbus was just there for their gold.” Well, some of that was right…

Ana to me, with great patience and condescension, after I got confused while reading her Spanish homework, “Mommy, Spanish is not like English.”  Oh, the things Ana puts up with, y’all…

After Ana declared that she’s decided to be a teacher instead of a pop star (hooray for that!), I told her and Emma both all about the teachers in our own family. We talked about how Aunt Kerry has been a teacher, a principal, and is now an administrator. Emma to me, “Wow, she was all that?!” Me to Em, “Yeah!” Em to me, “And you were nothing!” Ana to me, “Yeah, you were just a mommy.” Wow.

Hope you have a great weekend…

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